Dating when you are bisexual can bring up some unique challenges, but it can also be a rewarding experience. Being honest and open with yourself and your potential partners about your sexuality will help you to find the right person. One who is accepting and understanding of your identity, who shares similar values, and who will support you.
Not everyone will fit the bill. Therefore, it is important not to rush into relationships and to take the time to get to know potential partners before making a commitment. With that in mind, here are a answers to some of your most burning questions about dating when you are bisexual.
How long into a relationship should you tell the person you are dating that you are bisexual?
There is no set timeline for when to tell someone you are dating that you are bisexual. It is important to consider your comfort level and how much you trust the person you are dating before disclosing any personal information.
If you feel comfortable, you can tell them whenever you feel is best. It is important that you be honest and open about your sexuality so that you can have a healthy relationship built on trust. Therefore, if you see that your relationship is progressing, it is probably that time to have a conversation.
How should you tell your date you are bisexual?
It is important to be honest and open about your sexuality with your date, so the best way to tell your date that you are bisexual is to state it directly. Let them know that it is important to you and that you are comfortable with it. Be prepared to answer any questions they may have, and try to be patient if they don’t understand right away.
What questions might someone you are dating ask about being bisexual?
Though you can never fully predict what someone will ask about anything, the person you are dating might find themselves on the following thought train. If you are the type who likes to prepare or role-play before a conversation, consider formulating answers for the questions below.
How did you come to realize you are bisexual?
How long have you known you are bisexual?
How does your bisexuality affect your relationships?
How do you feel about monogamy and non-monogamy?
What is your experience with dating people of different genders?
What do you need to feel comfortable and safe in a relationship?
What do you think are the most important aspects of a healthy relationship?
How have you dealt with the stigma of being bisexual?
What would you like me to know and understand about your bisexuality?
How do you handle potential conflicts that may arise due to your bisexuality?
Some of these questions may be ones you have spent a long time thinking about already. Others, not so much. Regardless of whether these talking points are old or new to you, giving them attention can only serve to strengthen your relationship with someone else, as well as with yourself.
What should you say if someone doesn’t want to date you because you are bisexual?
Not everyone will be receptive to the idea you are bi-sexual and will have their reasons for feeling the way they do, regardless of if you agree with them or not. The bottom line is you can’t and, more importantly, should not have to convince someone to like you.
With this in mind, you can offer the following responses, understanding that these statements may very well be a part of your goodbyes:
It’s okay if you don’t feel comfortable with my sexuality, but it’s who I am. I hope you can respect that.
That’s unfortunate, but it’s important to respect everyone’s preferences and boundaries. It’s perfectly natural to have an attraction to more than one gender, and I hope you can keep an open mind about it in the future.
Then move forward with your life to find someone who is more compatible with you. You deserve that.
How can you find people to date who will accept your bisexuality?
As with most else in dating, there are ways to refine your search and put yourself in the line of sight with those who share your values, interests, and lifestyle. Here are a few ideas to get you started.
1. Join a local bisexual or LGBTQIA+ group.
Joining a community of like-minded people can be a great way to find potential dates who are accepting of your sexuality.
2. Get involved in LGBTQIA+ events.
Attend local events hosted by LGBTQIA+ organizations or businesses and mingle with other people who are open to dating bisexuals.
3. Use dating apps.
Many dating apps now have options for users to identify as bisexual or queer. This can help you find people who are open to dating someone who is bisexual.
4. Try online dating websites.
There are many online dating websites geared toward the LGBTQIA+ community. These websites can help you find people who are open to dating someone who is bisexual.
5. Find a dating coach/matchmaker in your search.
Enlist the assistance of a dating coach/matchmaker who supports everyone’s individuality.
Final thoughts …
It is ultimately up to you to decide whether or not to tell someone you are dating about your sexuality and, if you do, when. First and foremost, you should always consider what you feel comfortable with and how open or private you would like to be, keeping in mind how the information could potentially impact the person you are seeing and your relationship with them — which may very well be for the better.