It’s no secret that dating takes effort, a positive attitude, and money. But what it also takes is time — a good amount of it if you want to be successful, i.e., meeting not just matches but viable matches. Most people are busy with family, work commitments, friends, and supporting causes they believe in, so the effort you put into dating must be deliberate. It means you may have to find time where you didn’t think it existed before. Here are a few questions to ask yourself as you go about doing so. 

Are you ready to date and willing to commit time to looking for matches? 

People tend to do what they want when they want, so you need to get real with yourself about whether you’re ready to date and, if you are, whether you’re willing to commit time (and how much of it) to dating. That means also committing time to finding someone to date first.  

Yes, scrolling through profiles takes time. So does interacting with matches, whether you are doing so through the dating app, text, video, or the phone.  

Remember, you can hire a professional to take scrolling and early communication off your plate. Even so, you will still have to allocate time to go through the matches collected for you and act on them. In other words, there’s no getting around how long meeting someone can take, which is why you should clarify whether this is the right point in your life for you to try. If it is …  

Are you willing to commit time to going out on dates? 

Suppose you’ve managed to carve out time to find matches and have reached the point where you’re ready to schedule dates with a few different people. Are you now willing to commit time to going out on the dates you set up?  

Even short dates, like coffee dates, take time. There is the time to get there, the time you spend talking, and the time you will need to get back home or to the office. Meals and activities, of course, will take longer.  

If you’re planning on dating a few people, which you should when you’re newly single since smart dating is about meeting as many people as possible until you find one person you want to date more regularly, that will require even more time. Do you have it, and if you find it in your busy schedule, are you willing to devote it to this endeavor? Again, it’s important to understand this.  

Are you clear on your dating goals? 

How much time you’re willing to devote to dating will depend on the kind of relationship you want. Presumably, if you’re searching for a life partner or spouse, you will be more discerning in your choices than if you want to stay strictly casual and can move from person to person freely. The latter relationship partner, who you should apprise of your relationship goals with full transparency, will also likely not demand as much of your time and be more understanding if you’re unavailable to see them.  

If all your busy schedule can accommodate is a casual relationship, there’s nothing wrong with looking for one. However, it helps to be clear with yourself as much as it does dating prospects about your intentions from the beginning to avoid confusion and not waste anyone’s time, including your own, especially since you are already in short supply of it.  

Are you prepared for what will happen if you meet someone you like? 

Now suppose, after all this, you find someone you want to date more seriously and, as a result, more often. Will you have time for that? This question, too, is important to consider because you don’t want to find yourself having to throw back a great catch only for someone else to scoop that person up.  

If someone is as amazing as you think they are, another person will probably think the same. So, you want to be prepared if your dating goals, especially if yours is to find a partner, come to fruition. The best way to do this is to look at your calendar to see where you can find time and whether you would be willing to make certain concessions if you had to in the name of a relationship.   

How to Find Time in a Busy Schedule to Date and Have a Relationship 

As mentioned earlier, people generally do what they want and find ways to do it when push comes to shove. If you’re considering dating and what would happen if you met the person of your dreams, pretend you are already in that situation and ask what you would do. 

If you’re not an organized person or, on the other hand, are extremely regimented, you may want to think about mending your ways and consider the commitments you could or would be willing to move around. The first that comes to mind is when you exercise. With so many gyms, classes, and home workouts available, many scheduling options exist. If you’re working out during prime dating hours and anticipate a conflict, see if you can do your workouts in the morning or at lunchtime instead. 

Speaking of lunchtime or even breakfast, both times, despite being during the workday, can do double duty as a date. So can grabbing a coffee mid-afternoon if you are able to sneak away for a break.  

Do you love to walk early in the morning? See if your date would like to join you and top it off with a fruit smoothie afterward. Do you like to walk home from work or right after work? Make it a date. The key is to get creative and maximize your time.  

Do you not like talking on the phone with people you’re considering dating or people you are? Walk and talk at the same time. Fold your laundry. Tidy up. Just because you’re talking doesn’t mean you can’t be on the move. Drives are also good times to connect. That’s what Bluetooth is for.  

Finally, consider how much time you’re wasting during the day or how much time you spend doing something unproductive that you could reduce or let go of in favor of spending time with a person whose company you enjoy. Someone who could make you stop looking at the clock. Someone you could consider spending a lifetime with. Would you find time then?